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Mama of 3 beautiful, loving, compassionate girls. Wife to an awesome man. Granddaughter, daughter, sister, auntie, friend. My journey to living a cleaner, gmo free, much more "natural" life. Mother Nature is my religion. From a sheep in the herd, to a free thinking mama of three girls! I will share info here that I find interesting about pregnancy, birth, babies, breastfeeding, kids, food, beauty & style! "When you learn, teach"- M.Angelou

Saturday, January 15, 2011

If you're a mommy put your hands up!

There's this lil thing on facebook, called "Circle of moms". Have you heard of it? Are you a part of it? I am. I must say, I VERY rarely go on there, but I will occasionally get an email from one of the groups...ie: wives of the oil patch, young moms, ect. And one of the posts that was emailed to me, was "Do you neglect yourself for the sake of your family?" And then, the other morning, I was chatting with my BFF, and she mentioned that moms wear bandana's...and it got me thinking. Do YOU feel guilty when you take the time to apply mascara? Do you feel like a better mom than "her", because you're hair is a frizzy mess, and she looks like she just walked out of the salon? Maybe this doesn't apply to you whatsoever. I hope that is the case, but I know that it's usually how moms think.

It's pretty much bred into us that our purpose in life, is to take care of everyone else first, and if there is time, maybe you can go pee. When my first daughter was born, I realized that peeing was now a luxury. She was very small when we were released from the hospital- 5lbs 1oz, and was incredibly jaundice. SO jaundice in fact, that all day-I sat on the couch-trying-to nurse her. She would eat for 45-60 seconds at a time, and I would tickle her feet, poke her cheek, ect, trying to wake her up to eat for another 45 seconds- ALL DAY. This was my life for a straight 4 weeks. Until we had to go to the Children's Hospital, because she was STILL jaundice at a month old. It was after that, that I "caved" and started alternating formula bottles, and nursing. I'm trying to think of a time that I felt more guilty.... I can't. I wasn't being a "good mom". It was splattered everywhere that "breast is best", and I was a failure. But I had to pee. I couldn't sit on the damn couch with my shirt open all day anymore! And at that moment, my life began to change......

I still think that breastfeeding is a great choice-IF you can do it. It's not for everyone. It's HARD. No one told me how freaking hard it would be! I got mastitis after we got out of the Children's Hospital, and ended up in the hospital that night, with a fever of 106F-the worst the hospital had ever seen. (at 108F, you're brain dead.) I was on IV antibiotics and Tylenol 3-literally every hour and 1/2- for seven days. Why am I telling you this? Because breastfeeding is a touchy subject...and I know people will be pissed about my opinion- so I want to put it out there, that I've been through the worst, but also the best of it. So I don't want emails about how it IS best, and that I shouldn't tell people not to, or vice versa....I'm NOT telling you that you should or shouldn't, but I DO tell my friends who are expecting that I think they should at least TRY. It's easy for some, and hell for others.

Now, what does breastfeeding have to do with style? Lots. For those of us who are new mamas! It consumes your life-at least until you get the hang of it-and after you kinda know what you're doing-you have to dress appropriately to do so. If you have a child that needs your nourishment, you need a top that that you can pull down, or pull up comfortably to fit a small being under. (While getting nasty looks from assholes who think breastfeeding in public is "gross".-PS- if you are one of those said assholes, and you are accidentally reading this- it's not gross. It's food for a BABY. Would you rather that mother starved her baby, and let the child scream in hunger, so that she didn't offend you in the mall? Get over yourself.) Ahhh. THAT felt good to say. Now, carrying on.

I was poor as dirt when I had my first newborn, and had maybe 2 or 3 nursing tops, so I often ended up in a regular shirt, and had to lift it up. Ewww. Mummy tummy in public...not a good colour on me. So-if YOU are expecting, or have a small baby that you are nursing-button downs are your best friend. (PS-invest in a GOOD nursing cover. They rock. I just found this one, and if I have another baby one day-hahaha!-I will buy 2 of these: http://gritsembroidery.com/catalog/product_info.php?products_id=34)

(Ooooh-a tip for planning ahead for a baby-go to maternity stores when you are at the beginning of your 9 month adventure, and hit the sale rack. There will probably be something on sale for the season you're baby will be born in. )

Now, back to the bandanas. Please stop. There is NO way to wear them that looks good. I wear a bandana-under my helmet, when I am snowboarding, or riding a Harley. It is STRICTLY to keep my hair out of my eyes. One time I threw a bandana on-hairband style when I was cleaning, and then looked in the mirror and saw this:
So I haven't worn it again. What if my purolator guy came? Hahaha. I'm joking. I don't care what I look like when I clean...but if I don't look like a mess, I find that cleaning isn't as dreaded as usual. (look good=feel good thing...)

Ok, so I guess the point I'm trying to get to, is this:
  • You aren't helping anyone if you don't take care of yourself first. HOW in the world can you be the best mom, if you aren't being the best YOU? (oooh, that was good. ;)
  • Have you seen the SNL "Mom Jeans" skit? If not, go to you tube and find it. "Mom Jeans-because she's not a woman anymore-she's a mom!" I laughed so hard, and still laugh when I see it.
  • You aren't setting a good example for your children. Your daughters will try to continue the cycle, and will feel the same resentment, loneliness, and exhaustion. Your sons, will expect their wives to be like you, and he and his wife will fight, and he will say, "Well, my mom did it like this", and then your future daughter-in-law will seek out the nearest voo-doo doctor, and curse you. 
 Like always, this is said with love....if you're angry, build a bridge, because I was the mom trying to do it all in jogging pants, and trust me-it's greener over here.


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